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Dec 20, 2022Liked by Jonathan Courtney

When you put the question "How are you today?" and you get the answer "Thank God is Friday" or "You know, Monday morning...", then you know that person does have a work where escaping is a need. I heard in a podcast a theory about finding your path by the intersection of these 4 circles:

- talents

- passions

- values

- motivation

These are going up or down during life but for me this theory works really good and wanted to share it:)

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I think that the outlook of life and what age you are in determines, if you understand the balance of life. We all need to rest from what we are doing and experience other things, to continue to be effective in what we do as work. Working long hours do not make us effective and productive. The brain solves problems and is more creative when you sleep properly or you go for a run or walk before going to a creative meeting. It is dinosaurie mindset and old hat thinking that you can just keep going without rest and other inspiration. If you are between 25 and 41 years of age, you probably have this mibdset as you are so career focused and think that you are immortal. But the earlier in life you understand that work balance is key to a quality of life and makes you more successful and fun to be around. Die hard work people are incredible boring people to hang out with. As an entrepreneur I wish that I had my mind of today in my 20’s and 30’s, then life would be very different today and I would have been more successful, and I would have enjoyed my journey of life even more. In Scandinavia, quality of life is ingrained in us and part of the fabric in our culture, that is why we use the word, hygge, as something about having a cosy time away from everything. So at the end of my hectic day, when doing my yoga or calistenics session, I find back to myself ro unwind, able to hear my thoughts, to be a strong and effective person the next day to be a person in balance and in good health. And that is why I love myself dearly and people around love me too, and I am able to share love with other people because I am in balance. And when you live everyday as you last day in your life, you damm owe to yourself to take care of yourself and other people around you. This is the meaning of life and this is how you become successful as a human being.

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The quote you shared by Seth G about creating a life you don't need to escape from and your thought on how you see work and life as a seamless integration- both spoke to me.

As a gritty, hardworking American who was driven to hit all the "gold standards" impressed upon our society in order to climb to a place where I could feel like " I'd made it to "successful", is a pressure that can lead to some unhealthy work habits.

In my case it wasn't until I took a step back and paused about 10 years into my career, at a time I had my fiance waiting at home for me for the first time, that I realized working 11 hours a day most days isn't normal or healthy and that I was a workaholic that never stopped climbing and digging at the pace I felt I had to in H.S. and college in order to climb out of poverty and a tiny, poor, rural, country town.

So in my case it took finally realizing my scale was way to heavy on the work side (work life balance) that I started to finally seek out ways to figure out what I was still chasing and trying to escape, find resolve that and then used my freed up energy and space in my mind to gravitate towards things that I could do to create a more seamless integration of work and life.

Which I feel like all great seamless integrations as news things get thrown at it, its important to be in tuned enough to know when a tweak or adjustment is needed. :)

Example

what I was chasing for a decade

- get the college degree in an in demand field/study focus

- Go to the right university (both = drowning in student loan debt for 15 years)

- get the right internships & volunteer work

- build strong relationships and referrals

- get the job at one of the top corporations in my state

- get the role that pays well

- keep climbing to roles with more influence on whats being made/done

- get those roles by getting additional training & certifications and by taking on more and more responsibility to show decision makers your worth and capabilities, willingness to go the extra mile

- 40 hour work weeks quickly turn into 60 hours

In my case the dopamine hit of landing the projects, budget and resource approvals, producing winning products, programs & results getting the accolades, promotions, building trust and bridges with every team and resource group and winning results fueled me for years to a REALLY FAST PACE.

It kept me hungry and motivated and at the time it is what I felt was what it takes to keep "climbing the ladder" and to be as successful as possible

Finally pausing and giving myself the time to observe and process things more beyond the projects and work efforts helped me notice traits, work habits, mindsets, approaches to working by observing my peers and business thought leaders more. It was then that I was finally able to establish a way forward that is much more sustainable, enjoyable, while still effective. And even more effective!

What is the sang?..

"When the student is ready the teacher appears"

When we give ourselves time to pause, deeply reflect, notice our surroundings, how we feel, relax our minds.. thats when some of the greatest ideas and realizations come.

For me it took realizing my work life balance scale was tipping to get me down the path and mindset of figuring out what a more healthy, enjoyable and seamless integration would be.

"Work life balance" is like step one and a flowery non critical way way of getting people to admit there's a problem πŸ˜„

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Your work is always one of those things:

- a job to make money so you can actually do the things you really like and are passionate about it. Aka to pay your bills

- a career, so you can climb the career ladder higher and get the respect, recognition and power you think you deserve

-a calling, something you would do it for free because the work is rewarding by itself to you

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